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The Great Globglogabgalab
"I'm the Globglogabgalab. I love books. And this basement is a true treasure trove." - Great Globglogabgalab, 2013 The Great Globglogabgalab is an anthropomorphic worm-yeast thing that needs no introduction. Not only is he clearly bestowed with unbelievable beauty (picture, right), but he is also full of wisdom. Pure, unadulterated, X-rated wisdom. (He read the entire Fifty Shades of Grey series forwards, backwards, diagonally and skipping every 17th word). It is unknown how he reproduces, although accounts from an eyewitness (who wished to remain nameless) said "It's freaking huge, man!". There are many rumours of his creation but most Globgloists (people who study of the GLOB particle) agree on one, but it only came about due to estimates by mathematicians and physicists using logic and the theory of relativity. He came to the foreground in 2013 with his hit single, simply titled "I am the great Globglogabgalab". Biography As a result of the great data wipeout of 2018 most of the knowledge gained by the Globglogabgalab was lost. However, thanks to our tireless research team we were able to find a replacement book that contained both scriptures Act 14 book 17 page three and Act 33 book 4 volume 3 page 1009. The total sum of all knowledge of humanity can be contained within the result answer manifold of the "GLOB" as most Jewish incarnate will explain. From what is gathered by the ARC circle, who worship the Globglogabgalab as one of their 3 major command deities. The others being THE ANDERSON BEAST and MAY both are unknown to science. The Globglogabgalab was created when a star collapsed to the size of one Planck length, this created a quantum vacuum which transcended the matter into a black hole of knowledge. The Globglogabgalab made it's way to the closest 'intelligent' species, humanity. (the council of Scar still debate whether humanity can be classified as intelligent, especially after the BHVYTJD%$YCV^KUB&T^I&N species rose to power) Trivia * He loves books. * He once took on an army of headless snake men with nothing but a book on masturbation, a teaspoon and the coffin of a recently deceased firefly. * He loves books. * He loves books. * Not even the great Crazynumnums (see here) is sure how poor cooking could have resulted in a living, breathing, entity, but it did, and it's certain that nobody is complaining. * His song, "Globglogabgalab", has recently garnered over 15 million total views on YouTube, which is less than 2% of Lil Pump's "Gucci Gang", despite the fact that the Great Globglogabgalab is 1 000 000 000 times more talented, way more attractive, and more sexually able. * He was nearly arrested late 2016 for 'illegal arms possession'; However, the police refused to touch his simultaneously sticky, wet, and squishy skin, and he was subsequently let go. * He has been printed on numerous t-shirts, and other such merchandise, as a result of his fame. * His birthday is on the 30th of February. Don't ask. Even he doesn't know. Quotes "His d*** would spin so fast, like he was a helicopter." "I'm a fidget Spinna, WHEEEEEE." "The shwabble-dabble-wabble-gabble flibba blabba blab." Relationships